[CDATA[ */ Call us at (209) 989-4425 or get in touch with us online to talk to a lawyer who can help today. But how do you create joint custody schedules after figuring out what’s fair to everyone involved? If you and your ex can’t reach an agreement on your own, you may want to talk about divorce mediation. Infants and Toddlers: Generally, this age requires more frequent transitions to maintain a relationship with both parents as primary caregivers if that is your goal. Pros: the timeframe is shorter with regard to not seeing your children compared to the week on/week off schedule, and you … While a divorce can be very difficult for adults, it can cause problems for any children in the mix. Then, the next week it switches. If your goal is to save time, money and create the best life going forward for you and your kids, doing your homework is critically important. You can alternate this schedule so both parents have the kids every other weekend or otherwise modify it to meet your needs, too. The 2-2-5-5 schedule: Your child(ren) spend(s) 2 days with each parent and then 5 days with each parent. Don’t drag them into the negotiations but do inform them of changes that impact their lives. CustodyZen.com is an amazing website that helps divorced parents communicate the important issues related to raising thier children. You know what’s best for your family, so it’s just a matter of putting it down on paper and reaching a parenting time agreement between yourselves. If you are unsure how to contact a child therapist, or if you would like to discuss in detail visitation schedules that may be the best for your children, contact an attorney specializing in matters of child custody and visitation. Flexibility also helps to keep the child(ren) out of the conflict too. This doesn’t mean you and your co-parent do not have issues between you. Often, email is a viable way to communicate, we just recommend you keep it brief and courteous. While family law judges always consider the kids’ best interests, only you know what will work well for your family. In addition, and based on feedback from families I work with, as kids get older, they want more information. It is true that 50/50 physical custody is more common now than a decade ago, it may not be the right schedule for you and your co-parent. With this custody schedule, the children reside with Parent A for two days, then with Parent B for two days, then spend a long three-day weekend with Parent A. The options are abundant and may be customized but, if you are sharing 50/50 custody, there are a few common practices that exist for rotating the schedule. visitation, schedules, custody, arrangements, divorce, agreement How can CustodyZen Help divorced or separated parents raise happier children? Life is always interesting and challenging. If agreement cannot be achieved after, for example, three rounds of back and forth by email, you can specify, in your Parenting Plan that you see a Parenting Coordinator or Mediator specializing in parental conflict, to get help resolving your disagreements. Joint Custody Schedule … For examples of time sharing based on other common physical custody percentages schedules, for example, 60/40, 70/30 and 80/20, visit www.custodyexchange.com. The 3-4-4-3 schedule: Your child(ren) spend(s) 3 days with one parent, 4 days with the other parent, 4 days with the first parent and then 3 days with the other parent; The 2-2-5-5 schedule: Your child(ren) spend(s) 2 days with each parent and then 5 days with each parent. For many parents, it’s best to have the kids stay in one home during the week and visit with the other parent periodically. So, you’re getting a divorce. In this case, the parent who spends less time with the child (less than 146 days a year) is considered the non-custodial parent and has “visiting and prolonged outing rights” with the child. One important aspect of your divorce is how your kids will spend time with you and your co-parent. Do you or your co-parent travel for work or other reasons on an unpredictable schedule? The decisions and schedules put into place early in a contested , uncontested , or collaborative divorce are vitally important and can be very difficult to change. It’s essential to be informed about the choices you make during this life transition, even if the divorce isn’t your first choice. The key, again, is a plan that is workable and keeps conflict low(er). Here are some general suggestions for visitation: Cherie Morris practices as a Parent Coordinator and Certified Divorce Coach. In general, physical custody refers to the location of the child on the various days of the week; legal custody refers to refers to the responsibilities of making major decisions that affect the child's welfare, including decisions regarding the health, education and religious upbringing of the child. As you work on this, here are some questions to ask yourselves: Would you, or they, have the right of first refusal? If it isn’t, and you do not anticipate improvement, you may need to have a schedule with some specificity, for example, choosing a neutral place like the school or an extra-curricular activity, so that picking up and dropping off does not require you to see your co-parent in person. A less common but possible option is called “Nesting.” This requires the co-parents to move in and out of the household instead of the child(ren). /* ]]> */ One advantage of the 2-2-5-5 schedule is having your child(ren) consistent days of the week, that is, you will always have Mondays and Tuesdays or Wednesdays and Thursdays, for example, which allow you to schedule particular lessons or events for consistent days that they are with you. Alternate weeks with a midweek visit. The percentage of time you have the child may impact the child support you receive or pay. If your child spends more than 219 days a year with one parent: the child is in “sole” custody. She is trained as a lawyer, yoga teacher and is also an author, divorced mother of 4 and now part of a blended family. This works for equal custody, provided that you alternate weeks. If you have current conflict, based on the divorce, it can be difficult to think clearly about how this looks to your children. All of the schedules we’ve discussed relate to moving the kids from one household to another. Often, co-parents alternate holidays and days off from school annually or, and this is the important part, in the way that best works for them and their child(ren). Joint Custody Schedule Example 3 This custody schedule assumes that you have equal time with the kids, and that you’ll alternate every other week (so one week, Parent 2 has the kids for four days in a row; the next week, Parent 1 has the kids for four days in a row). This custody schedule assumes that Parent 2 has more time with the kids, and you can alternate Wednesdays and every other weekend. It means you need to be able to discuss issues related to your kids, even when you disagree, and have a method to resolve the disagreement that doesn’t drag your kids into the middle of the conflict. 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